


Love You Like a Love Song

by Queenie_004



Category: To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before (2018)
Genre: F/M, First Time, Fluff and Smut, I Love You, Sexy Study Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-24 22:21:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16184351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenie_004/pseuds/Queenie_004
Summary: "She didn’t think it would be this hard. It should be easy, should be the easiest thing in the world. She felt it. She’d felt it for awhile now, even before they became legit and probably somewhere deep inside her there were still small sparks of it from middle school. And he had no trouble at all with it. He did it first, in fact. And he was patiently oh so very patiently waiting for her to do it too."Like all writers I crave feedback! Please share in the comments if you have any and thank you for reading!I'm finally on Tumblr!





	Love You Like a Love Song

She didn’t think it would be this hard. It should be easy, should be the easiest thing in the world. She felt it. She’d felt it for awhile now, even before they became legit and probably somewhere deep inside her there were still small sparks of it from middle school. And he had no trouble at all with it. He did it first, in fact. And he was patiently oh so very patiently waiting for her to do it too.

Telling Peter Kavinsky she loved him should have been at the tip of her tongue morning, noon and night because she did love him, she loved him a _lot_. Sometimes it overwhelmed her that her feelings could be so strong. Nothing in her countless viewings of John Hughes movies had warned her how terrifyingly beautiful being in love could be. But her fear was still holding her back and even though she knew it was irrational, that’s the thing about fears, isn’t it? They often don’t make sense but you let them govern your life anyway. She was so careful to let people in because loving them meant the cost of losing them was that much greater.

Peter knew this and it’s why he assured her he wasn’t going to break up with her because she couldn’t yet say it back, “I’m a patient man Covey, so take your time. But just so you know, once you do say it? I’m gonna wanna hear it like, all the time. Daily. Maybe hourly. Just set a timer on your phone for your 15-minute ‘tell Peter I love him’ reminders” Then he’d grin his big, goofy, gorgeous, sexy grin and envelop her in his arms and she’d feel it so strongly, _I love you too_ but still her fears tethered the words to her heart.

***

On a Saturday afternoon towards the end of spring semester Lara Jean heads over to Peter’s to study. She has a report to write and he has a test to study for and his mom has taken Owen with her to some estate sales while at her house, Kitty is having a “Girls Day” with her BFFs and things are loud to say the least.

When he opens the door his eyes travel over her head to foot and he says, “Girl are you trying to kill me?”

She glances down at the romper she’s wearing with its cap sleeves and little buttons along the front then further down at her vintage boots that she might’ve just happened to remember he finds sexy when she was deciding what to wear that morning. She just flutters her eyes and coos, “If I’m trying to kill you Peter Kavinsky, believe me, you’ll know” and gives him a kiss as she comes inside.

After unpacking the muffins she made and making themselves coffee, they settle in on the couch to get to work. Peter with his notes and textbook and Lara Jean with her laptop and notebooks. Occasionally she’ll read something she wrote out loud and ask his feedback. She likes that Peter is not a Dumb Jock. He’s an average student but much smarter than a lot of people think he is just because he’s the captain of the Lacrosse team and Mr. Popular.

He asks her some questions about something in his notes and she quizzes him a few times. She’s taken her boots off and folded her legs under her (“Awww, c’mon you just got here! Those are already coming off?” he’d moaned as she’d unlaced them) as she faced him on the couch. She liked watching him when he was being quiet (which was rare for sure). She loved his dark head of curls and when a stray one would tumble onto his forehead and how he’d bite his bottom lip when he was concentrating. He had those warm golden flecked eyes she’d swooned over so long ago and a pleasing face. He was handsome but not classically handsome or the usual “Pretty Boy” she normally found attractive. But he was good looking by any measurement and sometimes when she looked at him she felt such a wash of desire flood through her veins.

“You staring at me Covey?” he says without taking his eyes off his notes, “’Cause it’s kinda hot.” She blushes and puts her eyes back on her screen but her focus is off and she can tell he’s watching her now. She looks back up and he’s got his flirty little smirk on and is raising an eyebrow at her and she bursts out laughing. “Let’s take a break” he says as he puts his stuff on the coffee table and leans over to move her laptop. “A kissing break.”

She laughs, “a kissing break? Is that a thing?”

“It is now” he grabs her and pulls her up against him as she giggles and cups his face in her hands. Their kisses are soft and sweet.

They kiss and nuzzle and she rests her head on his chest and he lays his cheek on the top of her head and they stay that way for a few minutes until Lara Jean says, “is there more to a kissing break? Like is it just kissing or…” she pauses and Peter is quiet a beat then says, “it can be more. I mean, I don’t make the rules, so…”

She moves her hand over his stomach and brushes her face against his shoulder dotting it with light kisses. He’s wearing a t-shirt so she can feel the smooth hardness of his muscles underneath her lips and fingers and it feels so incredibly good. She moves her face up and finds his neck, leaning in she kisses him once, twice and the third time she feels him expel a deep breath. Something is catching fire inside of her and she doesn’t want it to stop. “When’s your mom getting home?” she whispers into his ear as her hand finds the hem of his shirt and dips underneath it.

“We’ve got some time” he says, his voice a low throaty whisper which throws fuel on her fire.

And then he turns and presses her backwards until she’s laying down and he comes to rest between her legs. She watches his face as he moves over her and she thinks what she sees must be mirrored in her own: intense desire. She pulls him down onto her and slips her legs around to pin him and he makes a noise that sounds like shock mixed with pleasure. And then they’re kissing and it’s neither soft nor sweet this time. It’s hungry and heated, open mouths and panting breaths and she can feel Peter control his hips from moving against her but that’s not what she wants. Her hands travel down his back and along his ass where she pushes down and he groans and lets his instincts take over, grinding himself against her as his mouth moves to her jawline and against her neck, one hand sliding down her waist and the other grasping the back of her head. This is fire she’s on fire and she doesn’t want it to stop, she wants even more and her movements show him that as her nails drag along his back and her hips meet his in movement as they work together into a rhythm that is making her feel drunk with want.

She never understood before how much your body and its demands for pleasure could betray the beliefs and decisions you’ve made and long stood by. She and Peter have talked about having sex and have done plenty of fooling around, but she said she wasn’t ready to go all the way yet. Like telling him she loves him it’s one more thing Peter Kavinsky has lovingly and patiently agreed to wait for from her.

But at this moment as they are intertwined and winding each other into a frenzy, she remembers something Chris once told her—it was after she’d been hooking up with some guy she hadn’t even liked before they started sleeping together. “But why would you want to?” Lara Jean had questioned, “You don’t even like him let alone love him.”

Chris had grinned, “You don’t know” she said as her eyes got a glaze to them, “how fucking good it feels.”

Right now Lara Jean knows exactly what she meant, it feels So. Fucking. Good. There’s a moan coming from her throat that she doesn’t even recognize and Peter is tugging the small buttons of her jumper open exposing her heated skin to his demanding mouth. Even though she can barely think straight she knows that when she says what she says next, it’s with absolute clarity, “Let’s go to your room.”

Peter’s hair tickles her chin as he moves back up from her collarbone and looks at her right in the eyes, “Yeah?” he asks, and she nods her head. At that he stands and scooping her up she wraps her legs around his waist as he carries her upstairs.

***

She’s glad she didn’t have to walk because when he puts her down she feels the full weakness of her legs. She catches her breath and Peter whispers, “are you OK?” and she nods and then looking up at him she presses her palms into his chest and pushes him back until he sits on end of his bed. Then he is the one looking up at her for once and his eyes are like nothing she’s ever seen, like he worships her, like he would jump out the window right now if she pointed her finger at it and said go.

She’s read pages and pages of bodice rippers and she now understands how much they limit a woman’s power when it comes to sex. It’s always the pirate, or the cowboy, or the distant but passionate wealthy husband who holds all the control over the woman’s pleasure. He is the seducer and she is always the one yielding to his carnal knowledge and experience. And while Peter certainly has more experience to her measurement of none, she knows that right now she is controlling everything that happens in this room. And it emboldens her, stoking the heat that is already consuming her body.

He stares with his mouth a soft “oh” as she slowly pulls the scrunchie out letting her hair fall down her back. “Jesus” he breathes and she keeps her eyes fixed on his face as she finishes his work unbuttoning the jumper then drifting her fingers back to the collar she pushes it off her shoulders until it slips off falling to the floor. Peter says her name in a growl that makes her shiver with anticipation. She steps closer to him now just in her bra and panties and runs her fingers through his hair.

“Now,” he says in the same voice, “now you’re fucking _killing me_.” She smiles and reaches over his shoulder, as he presses his lips to the side of her torso and she pulls his shirt up and he raises his arms obediently as she takes his t-shirt off and tosses it back with her jumper on the floor.

“Peter” she says and he tips his head up to her, “I’m ready. I want to.”

He licks his lips and pulls her so now she’s the one on top of him as he moves them further onto the bed. “Are you sure?” he whispers between kisses, “it’s OK if you change your mind.”

“I know,” she loves his patience, his huge heart, his gentleness, “I want you Peter I want this. So much.”

He wraps his arms around her and rolls them over then moves to get off the bed. Her eyes must betray a panic because he chuckles, “I’m just getting this,” he gestures to a towel on the top of his team bag and she smiles but feels a bit of her bravado seep away. This isn’t a game of control at all but a moment between two people who want to be closer to one another than they’ve ever been before. He opens the towel up and lays it down, “just in case” he whispers and she nods because she’s been warned by her father, of course, and Peter takes her hands and helps her slide on top of it then he lets one hand go and digs inside his bedside drawer. Laying the shiny square packet on the edge of the towel he looks at her so earnestly as he comes back down towards her. “If you change your mind at _any_ point…”

“I know” she whispers, “I know. Thank you. But I need you to come here like, right now” she smiles as he crawls up over her and his bare skin feels so incredible against hers she’s not sure she’ll ever want to be clothed around him again.

They kiss and explore and she’s so happy, blissfully, stupidly happy even though they haven’t had sex yet and she knows that this is exactly how it’s supposed to be as they finally shed all the material that was still in the way.

“I’m going to take such good care of you Lara Jean” he says as he moves down her body.

“Peter?” her voice is soft but there’s absolute conviction in her words, “I love you.”

***

_Constantly, boy you played through my mind like a symphony_  
_There's no way to describe what you do to me_  
_You just do to me, what you do_  
_And it feels like I've been rescued_  
_I've been set free, I am hypnotized by your destiny_  
_You are magical, lyrical, beautiful_  
_You are, and I want you to know baby_

_I, I love you like a love song, baby_

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Love You Like a Love Song / Selena Gomez (2011)


End file.
